I want to trust people; I like to trust people. I can trust most everyone easily, on a basic level.
But when it comes to trusting them to the extent of unloading my soul and troubled thoughts on them, I can't do it anymore. No words come out. I try pushing them out and saying things but it catches in my throat and only releases cuts of words.
If people invite me to speak what's on my mind, it's a little bit better. But ultimately I am battling the mindset that I am broken and think to much and that sharing my problems will burden and wear away at whomever I share them with, like a pebble in their shoe.
This is all problematic because I want to form this deep relationship but I need to just relax. Relax.
Just because I know I'm being ridiculous, doesn't mean it's easy to stop
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